Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
i dont even know how to be here
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
BRING THE BAGELS
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
