bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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