Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
