did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
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