i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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