I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
