Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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