She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
