k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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