just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize