If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I think my vagina is haunted
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
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