i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
