So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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