So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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