She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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