I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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