i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
