This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Can Purell be used as lube?
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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