So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
