just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I met the friendliest cop last night
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
