I feel like I'm in dance class right now
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
