I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Pappa wants mamma naked
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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