you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
