I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
