I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
