waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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