I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
