I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
you didnt know i had herpes?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
