sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
It's blow job season.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
