She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Randomize
