this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I came so hard my ears popped.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
