I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
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