you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize