he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
