she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
