oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
