I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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