im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
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I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
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I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
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