I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
