I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
