It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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