New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
23 Cringeworthy Responses to “I Love You”
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.