And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
