Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
