how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I want to be your penis for a week.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
