Kiss
Puke
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
