oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
