Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
