Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
