dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Randomize