I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
